


Soft-Spoken Truths

by Jackdaw816



Category: Torchwood
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, F/M, Feelings Realization, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-10
Updated: 2021-02-10
Packaged: 2021-03-16 14:34:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,160
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29333874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jackdaw816/pseuds/Jackdaw816
Summary: The cover of darkness makes some things much easier
Relationships: John Hart/Toshiko Sato
Comments: 6
Kudos: 10





	Soft-Spoken Truths

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: “I’m not good with feelings, but here goes nothing. My life sucks less with you in it.”

Tosh wasn’t often scared. Uncertain, yes. Terrified beyond measure, far more often than she would have liked. But she rarely felt the fear she felt now, watching John Hart sleep beside her. No, she wasn’t in danger, like most people who had met John would assume. In fact, she felt strangely comfortable knowing that he was in arm’s reach.

No, what she was scared of was that this was the third night this week he’d stayed over. She hadn’t been surprised when he’d come on to her, had been a little surprised when she flirted back. The first night had been more than a little tipsy, the next had been completely sober, and the rest had all blended together. Now it had been months, and they’d both been steadily ignoring the... something growing between them. 

Cause, oh god, Tosh really liked him. He was an amoral bastard obsessed with her boss, but he was charming and surprisingly sweet. Also very handsome, even with his face all squished up against a pillow like it was currently. And sometimes, she thought he felt the same way. Those times, when he looked at her like she was the only one in the world, she felt like she could fly. Then he’d flirt (or more) with a stranger and she’d crash back to Earth.

She wasn’t jealous. Well, she was. But she couldn’t control her emotions. Logically, she was fine with it. John came from a different time, with different standards. Just because he flirted with anything on legs didn’t mean he couldn’t have genuine feelings for her. 

Although, who was she kidding? He didn’t feel the same. Soon enough he would leave, and he would take a piece of her already-shattered heart with him. She sighed and was about to lay back down, ready to sleep and suppress the typhoon of emotions swirling in her chest. Of course, it was then that John woke up.

She’d never seen anyone who woke up quite like John. His breathing didn’t change, he didn’t move, his eyes just snapped open, fully alert. She tried not to blush as his eyes swept over her slowly, taking in the view. He’d always been a bit of a voyeur, but Tosh felt, not to be a total cliche but well, beautiful under his gaze.

“What time is it?” he asked, voice scratchy with sleep, then raised his arm to check for himself. Tosh had only seen him take his bracer off once, and she considered it a gift that she had at all. It was armor, and while John had no problem being nude, without his bracer, he was truly naked.

“Late,” she responded, pushing aside her other thoughts. “Or rather, early.” For a moment, she expected him to get up and leave. He’d done it before, disappeared before the sun rose. But lately, he’d tended to stay. And sure enough, he flipped his bracer closed and pulled the comforter up higher.

“Hmm. Go back to sleep. Jack’ll get pissy if you come in sleep-deprived.” His voice was tired, but his eyes were bright. He took her arm lightly and pulled her closer to him. “Need help relaxing?” he teased before bending to kiss along her neck. She let him for a moment before pushing him off.

“No, I’m alright.” He grinned and rolled onto his back.

“You sure?” he said, raising an eyebrow. “I’m very talented.” This time she couldn’t help the blush that rose on her cheeks, damn it. But she shook her head. 

Normally, this was the part where she’d lay down and they’d get some well-needed rest. But tonight, Tosh didn’t move. After a few moments, John sat up to join her. He pushed a lock of hair out of her face and tucked it behind her ear.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, looking her over with what almost looked like concern in his eyes. “Why are you up anyway?”

“Just... thinking,” Tosh said, avoiding looking at him. Maybe it was time. Draw the line in the sand and see where he stood.

“About what?” His tone was teasing, but when she glanced at him, there was a genuine question in his eyes. “Because if it’s about your water pressure, I agree, it sucks. You should get someone to look at that.” She couldn’t suppress the laugh that escaped her. God, he was so random sometimes. But Tosh had learned to appreciate the spontaneity. 

“No, not that. Although, you have your own shower if mine is so crappy.” She meant for the statement to be teasing, but it came across as almost aggressive. He had his own flat, there was no reason to care about the water pressure in hers. She’d be a fool to think otherwise.

“You’re right, it’s not that,” John said. He leaned in, not quite close enough to kiss, but close enough that Tosh could easily close the distance. Normally, she would, but something in his eyes stopped her. “Tell me.” She looked away. Here we go, Toshiko. Moment of truth.

“Do you like me?” she blurted out, eyes fixed firmly on the blanket twisted in her hand. 

“Of course I like you, Tosh,” John said, tone light and genuine. Of course, it didn’t stay that way. “What’s not to like?”

“That’s not what I mean,” Tosh bit out. She swallowed her pride and turned to face him. “What is this? What are we?” John looked shocked for all of a second before grinning. Tosh’s heart sank. That was his fake smile, the one that was just a little too bright and had a few too many teeth.

“We’re having fun, aren’t we?” he said casually. She nodded slowly.

“We are, but John-” she reached out and took his hand. “I need to know. Why?” John opened his mouth, and she held up a finger. “And please don’t say any part of my anatomy.” He shut his mouth and considered for a moment before speaking.

“Look, Tosh.” He hesitated and it felt almost wrong. John never hesitated. “I’m not good with feelings, but here goes nothing.” Tosh’s eyes went wide. “My life sucks less with you in it.”

“What?” she breathed. She didn’t know what she’d been expecting, but it hadn’t been that.

“I’m happy around you,” John said. Now, he was the one to avoid Tosh’s gaze. “I feel safe around you. And so yes. I like you. And we’re whatever you want us to be. Well, we’d need to talk if you want a kid, but other than that, I’m down for whatever.” He grinned at her, this time one hundred percent genuinely. She couldn’t help but kiss him, and he responded in kind.

“This,” she panted once they broke apart. “I just want this. Us. For as long as we can.”

“Your wish is my command,” John purred before leaning in to kiss her again.

They didn’t get much sleep that night, but Tosh couldn’t be bothered to care. 


End file.
